Conan the Barbarian

Nearly thirty years after Arnold Schwarzenegger starred in the 1982 original, Conan is back but not as you know him. This remake sees a newcomer in the title role of the hulking, grunting warrior out to save the day from the villainous grip of mythical beasts and witches.

Set in fictitious, fantasy world, Conan ventures into an unforgiving realm after his father is murdered and his village destroyed. He journeys forth as a thief, pirate, and warrior, encountering adventure, action and women before stumbling upon the warlord responsible for his tribe's destruction. Angry, armed and out for revenge, Conan slices anything and anyone that gets in his way.

While it won’t win the actors any huge accolades, they nonetheless perform their respective roles with gusto, from Rose McGowan’s typically beguiling yet appropriately nasty villainess Marique to Jason Momoa as the brooding bulk Conan – rarely are his eyebrows not furrowed as he stomps around like a pit-bull tucking into a hornet’s nest.

Admittedly it doesn’t reinvent the action genre, but it certainly takes a stab at all its tropes to deliver a riotous two hours of high octane, skull-busting fun. Think Clash of the Titans; CGI shimmer, blood, guts and swordplay trounce story as big, blockbuster set pieces fill the screen with energy and mindless action for a more than adequate cinematic spectacle.

Luke Woellhaf